So I had an interview on the assembly! Yeah, the district overseer asks me if I've auxiliary pioneered recently. So I'm like, "well, I'm doing it now."
He says, "well, did you do it in March"?
Him: "Have any experiences?"
So at this point, I'm getting nervous, because I'm like, ok, "I have the feeling you're about to ask me to go onstage at the last minute...no thanks". So I kinda change the subject real quick and sneak out the chairman's office where he had me.
Jehovah's like, "uh...no".
So the brother who was to actually give the part (I just thought he was some random brother who was in the back), who reports to the D.O., is walking past me during the intermission. I say to him (maybe out of guilt), "hey, the D.O. asked me if I had pioneered in March, and if I have any ex..."
I didn't even get to finish the sentence.
The brother's eyes get big, and he quickly says, "YOU PIONEERED IN MARCH??"
Me: "Yeah, but..."
He then TIGHTLY grabs my arm, and pulls me to the back, BACK to the chairman's office.
As he's pulling me by force, I'm saying (loud enough for him to CLEARLY hear me), "no no no, brother, brother, no no, I don't have any experiences!! Brother!!"
He didn't respond.
We're now in front of the D.O. again. The brother looks at the D.O. and points to me..."He's pioneered".
The D.O: "ok, use him".
So the brother says, "I'm gonna ask you one of these 6 questions...pick 3."
So I pick 3.
Did we rehearse? Negative
Did he ask me what I was going to say? Negative
How much time did I have to prepare this? Hmmm, let's see. He was to go up at 1:35pm.
3 minutes before I am to go onstage, I'm in the chairman's office sweating, desperately trying to think of something, praying.
I ask the D.O. for his pen, he throws it to me from across the table, and I write like bloody murder.
I'm writing out the 2nd answer (everyone's singing), I'm not done...we have to go onstage.
I pray again, I'm trembling, he calls me last...I give it, and that was it...
I'm offstage thinkin...WHERE AM I????????
After the assembly, a sister comes up to me and grabs my hand, and in her accent says "bruddah, dat was soooo touching, you can feel dat deh truth is deeply rooted in you. I've been in deh truth for 25 years, and you just know".
I'm thinkin, "are you serious?"
She has no idea that that was soooo on the fly.
But it was touching!!!
Guess we all have a little Jonah in us.
Here's the interview: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_95uu-nn2-g